PERSONAL: I AM A WOMAN
23:17:00
I am a woman. And not only am I a woman, but I am also an outspoken feminist. And very often, when I say I am a feminist I am told, that this is an outdated concept, that at least in "the West" women do not suffer from sexism anymore, that I am a man-hater and an evil bitch.
I personally like to believe that none of these statements are true. Sure I can be bitchy, just like every other person especially when I have not gotten enough food or sleep, but I would not say that is my most prominent character trait. I surely do not hate men, in fact some of the people I love the most, such as my dad, my brother, my best friend and my boyfriend are in fact men. And sadly the last weeks have shown me, that even in our gorgeous Western world women suffer from sexism and not too little of it.
I clearly see the intense suffering women in the third world undergo and I am clearly aware of my intense privilege as a white, straight, able-bodied, educated woman and my inability to understand what women of colour, LGBQT women and women with disabilities go through.
But even with all that in mind I am outraged, I am hurt and I am ashamed of the world we built around us. Two very prominent cases have yet again sparked this anger in me and yes I am angry, I cannot look at these cases without any emotion, because just like many other women acts of sexism are not just a statistic, they are my daily reality. The two cases I have thought a lot about recently are the six month sentence for a Stanford swimmer, who raped an unconscious women behind a dumpster,
because a harsher sentence would have a "too severe impact" on his life. The other one is the story of a German, should we say it girl? who accused two men of raping her, filming it and putting it on the internet. And while she is clearly unconscious in the video and numerous time clearly says: "Stop it", those charges were dropped and now she is persecuted for wilful misrepresentation.
Now what do these cases show us about how our great Western society deals with women? Well first of all it shows us that we do not value the life-long emotional, psychological and sexual trauma of a woman, who was raped as much as the impact this act of violence will have on the future life of her rapist. That the fact that the victim will possibly never feel safe outside again, will possibly never feel like she owns her body again, will never be able to have normal sexual relationships again, that she will forever be haunted by what happened that night does not weigh up to the traume of a "promising athlete", who could miss out on the olympics, who can now not enjoy his favourite snacks anymore. It shows us the victim does not matter as much as the persecutor, that while it was Brock Turner, who committed a crime, who broke the law and who broke a woman´s spirit he is the one, who is protected by legal authorities.
It shows us that a talent in sport counts more, than the will to break the law. That the fact that this woman was unconscious, because she was drunk counts more than the fact that her assaulter used her unconsciousness for his own benefit. It shows girls all over the world, that if someone breaks your barriers, uses you as a sex object, rapes you, assaults you, in some crazy way it will be made out to be your fault. That while being drunk is not a crime and rape is, you will be held accountable for your actions, or should we say inactions, while your assaulter will most likely get away with a black eye. That even if you have witnesses, when the story is crystal clear, your persecutor will most likely be given the benefit of the doubt and it will be more about what you were wearing that night, than what he was doing. This is the message we send to rape survivors, to girls around the world and then we wonder why sexual assault and rapes are reported so very seldomnly. It is appalling and it is spiteful and if you do not think so after you read the letter of the victim, then please just fuck off into oblivion.
The case of Gina Lisa, a very openly sexual c-list celebrity. She is mostly known for her extremely short outfits, her platinum blonde hair and her fake tits. Which apparently gives everyone the right to dismiss her claims, as if openly sexual women can not be raped, as if women need to be punished for being sexual beings, as if the fact that she dies her hair and shows her body justifies publishing and watching the video of her possible rape for months on end. Every god damn woman deserves not to be touched against her will, not to be raped, not to be assaulted. It does NOT matter how much of her body she decides to show, because spoiler alert: it is HER body. Clothing does not mean consent, clothing and appearance does not justify and will never justify assault.
Rape or assault is never ever ever the victim´s fault. Rapists are and will forever be the only cause of rape. It is 2016 and women can still not be sexual beings as much as men, can openly enjoy and want sex, have numerous partners without being slut shamed.
If there is video evidence of a woman clearly too intoxicated to consent to sexual actions and her saying "No", that should be enough to know that what happened here is not okay. If someone cannot walk, talk, function anymore that person is unable to give consent whether she was given roofies or not, wether she wore a burka or a G-string, her no MEANS NO. There is no wrong way to deny sexual actions, a no should always be taken seriously. If consent is not given or cannot be given anymore you should not sleep with this woman or man for that matter. This case shows young woman, that they are not allowed to be sexual, that their no means nothing, that their clothing will always be more important than their assaulter´s actions.
It is 2000 fucking 16 and we still continue to teach women: Don´t get rape, instead of teaching men Don´t rape and this is exactly why feminism is more than relevant in our societies as well.
1 Kommentare
Leider so wahr... Und ein sehr guter Text!
AntwortenLöschenBin neu hier auf deinem Blog aber schon ganz vertieft - allein in den Blognamen muss man sich ja verlieben. Hast einen neuen Fan ;)
Ganz liebe Grüße!
Thanks so much for your lovely comments, constructive criticism and suggestions. I will try to answer all of you!